Hey, I’m glad you’re here!

I’m assuming since you’re visiting this page you might be interested in mental health or, at least just curious to see what Ill be writing about. Its ok either way, thanks for clicking!

When I decided I wanted to build a platform to share about mental health I wasn’t sure what I wanted to write or how to make it interesting. I spent too much time stressing about it and honestly, I still do. The Imposter Syndrome was and is still very LOUD.

So, I’ll just start by telling a little bit of my own story and we’ll go from there.

I was a sassy child, known to ask questions that left adults wishing cell phones with Google had been around in the 90’s. I can remember moments growing up when I had done things that people found impressive. My favorite was my pint-sized performance of Sojourner Truth’s poem “Ain’t I a Woman”. That earned me all the dollars in the bottom of every purse in church and as we left that day everyone approached me with compliments. I felt so big even though I was only a small child. After that came many more moments where I was praised. Mostly for doing well in school, dancing my heart out in recitals, or just being “special” in general, the kind of kid people expected big things from.

Fast forward about ten years and I still seemed like the same kid, but things were different. Years of bullying and emotional turmoil ate away and my confidence and I found more comfort in keeping that little girl safe and hidden away. I still did fairly well in school and appeared to be fine but mentally I was struggling and failing to excel like used to. I developed some unhealthy coping skills that landed me in therapy and I felt ashamed. I could not stop worrying about what my peers would think if they knew once a week my mother was driving me to meet some lady to talk about my big feelings. Ugh..

As much as I would love to say I felt better right away after starting therapy that would be a lie. I did enjoy rambling about my thoughts and I felt some weight lifted but it was only the beginning of me learning how to actually work on myself in therapy. I tried three or four therapist before finding one that actually got through to me. Finding a therapist is like making a friend. To clarify, its not a friendship but .. the vibes have to be right. Similar to meeting a new person and thinking “this is someone that I can relate to.” That did not happen for me until I was in my twenties, but I am still working with her years later and overall doing pretty well mentally.

As I continue to post here and talk about different mental health topics more of my story will come together. I view the people I work with much like I view myself, a puzzle coming together one piece at a time. Its a slow process. People are complicated, like those thousand piece puzzles that take forever to finish. You might even decide to quit out of frustration a few times, but eventually if you keep trying it will be complete. Working on yourself is just like that. Its complicated but if you stick with it, it feels good to see the results of your work.

So, all that to say welcome to my blog, welcome to my thoughts, welcome to what may be the beginning of putting your own puzzle together. Whatever it is, if you made it this far thank you, and welcome.